改essay,Funny essay ,How to end a relationship

Many of people think that to end a relationship is a troublesome and ugly routine.
"Many of people"很怪；that变成从句很累赘.还有end a relationship怎么会是routine?（除非经常甩人）
建议：Many people think ending a relation is a troublesome and ugly routine.
Here are my personal suggestions that might be able to help you enjoy such a process without worries afterwards,which means ending thoroughly.
"which means“没有错,但是这句话等于重复内容,建议去掉.
Firstly,show your great unwillingness as well as sadness to your pre-ex about breaking up.
正宗的英语其实没有firstly这个词,只有first：）.
This is the very step that lays foundation for all the followings,because you need to convince him or her that you really do not want to do this,from the bottom of your heart (of course it is fake).
This is the very WHAT step?
For example,say “let’s end the relationship” but add “I love you” at the moment the weeping wretch is turning around and going to leave.
不知道你这个文章多正式.weep wrench似乎用的不妥.（还有你这样可是给人家错觉还觉得有机会啊,怎么thoroughly甩人啊?!）
It is certain that he or she will come back to you; nevertheless,please do not respond to that person.
语法无误,但是内容自相矛盾了.不太明白你这个response该怎么理解（说爱ta然后突然不理ta?）如果一定要加这句,貌似应该放在总结那块.
不要用certain,because there are always exceptions.Certain,never,always这种词要慎用.
建议：It is likely that the person will come back to you;...
And here comes the good show.
很口语而且看上去超级arrogant,不要在文章中用.建议去掉.
After you speaking out such a fantastic dialogue,your ex must come to find you.
speak out dialoge?!!!第一：DIalogue 指对话,两个人才能进行的.第二：什么叫must come to find you?意思是你ex会对你有留恋?
建议：After the conversation,your ex will likely think there is still chance and try to mend the relaitonship.（这里我编了,因为不明白你想表述什么）
Now,you need to show some acting skills（你早就在acting了）—sometimes being considerate and sometimes merely feeling guilty.
你是说这个acting being considerate还是你自己being considerate?修饰的主语不明.
这句话很拗口.而且前面已经acting那么久,又矛盾了.
建议：－ 后的内容不要,
There is no doubt that your ex will ask what are you really thinking again.
there is no doubt 和 certain一个问题.ta前面有没有问你what are you thinking?何来again?!
建议：Chances are your ex will ask you to think twice about breaking up.
It is likely that your ex will try leaving you,and thus the third step is to make him or her stay.
我以为你第二步就make人家stay了?!
will try TO leave而不是try leaving.
In spite of indifference in ordinary days,you are supposed to show how you care about him
or her in special days,such as the birthday of your ex.
不要用in spite of,你后面那么多in in in,读上去很怪.用despite
you are SUPPOSED?有什么规矩要怎么show么?还有你后面解释的也不清楚,怎么个special way?
建议：special days.For instance,(后面去掉直接开始举例）
Tell him or her that you have spent over totally a month to make a birthday gift,but in the end,
you have not given him or her because you do not want him or her misunderstand
your attitude,which is “we have broken up”.
in the end,去掉.（而且你后面又用end,不要重复）
The end comes as your ex is heart-broken,and actively say farewell to you.
!无法理解ACTIVELY say farewell to you.前面一句完全是病入膏肓句.
Moreover,your ex probably will not find you any more for his or her fear of you.
find you any more什么?
建议：your ex probably will not find you insteresting as he/she got wholely tortured with this breakup game with you.
So do not worry about that your ex will interfere with yourlife.
do not worry有点断章取义的口吻.
建议：so you won't have to worry about your ex bug you in your life no more.
你是个妹子吧?写这种奇葩文.
如果完全不讨论context & content,这篇文章的语法还算ok的,但是上下文很散乱.
如果讨论context & content,我觉得会搞这个东西的人相当dipoler.
不谢.This is the very stepVERY 不是有exactly的意思吗？我是参考Sheldon"Hey.Leonard, is itawkward for you knowing that one of your dear friends had sexual intercoursewith a woman you used to love in the very place you lay your head?"From Big Bang Theory??你这种美剧的东西，建议正经的文章不要随便用。用法无错，但写作文和平时说话总是不一样的。